As my father and I stepped into the courtyard the gate closed behind us and I could faintly see Mara standing in the doorway to the dining room, looking as though she had seen a ghost.
“Siya?” she paused, almost in horror at the sight of me. I hardly responded, just offered her a glance as she ran over and grabbed my hands. “Keigan… She's colder than death… What happened?”
“It is a part of her training, her body is no longer harmed by it. She will live. More importantly, it worked. She should be much stronger now.”
She looked at me and rubbed her finger across my brow. When she pulled it away I could see it painted red. ‘Blood…’ I thought, and I began to feel nauseous.
I looked up at my father who was still wearing his stern expression. The hard training was one thing, but how he acted was another. When he had struck me I felt the heavy blow, but my body was numb, and my mind nearly empty. I had no idea just how hard he had hit me, but seeing Mara’s face, and the blood on her hand, told me more enough.
After all, if even she was in shock at the sight of me… it had to be bad. As my body began to melt I finally let a tear slip out, but it turned to ice as it rolled down my cheek, freezing before it could fall.
My brain was starting to function again, and as I finally started processing what all had happened I nearly broke down.
‘I really thought I was going to die.’ I tried to lift my arm to feel the wound on my head, but my joints were too stiff, every movement came with the cracking of ice, and my hand stopped long before it reached its destination. ‘This side of him… Can he really say that this was the only way… That it has to be done like this?’
Another tear formed in my eye, freezing before it could fall, making it hard to see. It stung… A part of me wanted nothing more than to cry my eyes out, but even at that moment, I held them back. Although, in that case, I wasn’t even sure how much I could cry. My body was emitting an aura of permafrost, too cold for any water to form.
Mara reached out to place a hand on my shoulder, but my father grabbed her hand. “It’s dangerous to touch her right now, she’s still suffering from some of the aftereffects.
I looked up at Mara, afraid I could not hide the longing in my face. When My gate was broken her warmth was the only comfort I found, even when I didn’t want it. Now that I did it seemed like I wouldn’t get it. It was like we were cursed to always be on the wrong page.
I felt so cold that my whole body was permanently stuck on edge, pins and needles running through me. I tried to shiver but was so tense that my muscles just locked up instead, eventually all cramping.
‘It's… Too dangerous to touch me?’ I lowered my eyes, looking past her to the door. ‘There's a fire inside. There has to be one right?’ I imagined the warm heat coming from the hearth. The simple thought alone was enough for me to feel warmer. ‘I’ve been alone my whole life, I can take care of myself by now. I just need to get inside.’
I tried to move my feet but the moment I stopped they froze to the ground. ‘What… now?’
My father had just said it was dangerous to touch me, and now I couldn’t move. ‘I’m stuck...’ I started crying, not just one tear, but many, each one freezing to my face until my tear ducts were blocked and I couldn’t see at all. My eyes stung, and blood swirled around them, mixing with the tears before freezing solid.
The fire in my mind froze over, just like the candle I had put out during training. ‘How long will I be stuck here… All night? I won’t even be able to warm up by the fire and it's right there…’
Everything only began to feel colder, even though the air around me was warmer than my own body. I could see a chilling fog coming off of my skin as the air around me cooled and fell to the ground.
My father took a step back. “As I said, she’s unstable right now, even being this close is risky.” He smiled nervously. “I wasn’t expecting her to have this much magic without training, it's actually kind of amazing…”
Seeing him smile at me when I was in that state sent me over the edge. I had always held back my tears, but the one time I wanted to let them out I physically couldn’t. At first, I wanted to scream, then I wanted to cry again. Denied either of those things, my mind went empty, and suddenly everything began to feel distant like I was drifting away from reality altogether.
I slowly closed my eyes, accepting my fate.
Before I drifted away the sound of cracking ice sent shivers through my whole body. ‘Shivers…’ I was moving again if you could call it that. I felt cold water dripping down my skin as I started to shudder, a tight compression wrapping around me like I had sunk into a warm cocoon.
‘Did my magic calm down… Or run out maybe? No… I can still feel it all around me… So then…’ I slowly rubbed my eyes, finally able to somewhat control my body again. They still stung, but I had to see what was happening, I had to know…
Forcing my eyes to focus I looked around, sure enough Mara had ignored the warning and wrapped her arms around me.
I grabbed her shirt, tugging on it as my body melted, and finally began to regain some sense of feeling.
I wanted to say something, but I wasn’t exactly quite sure what. a Thank you maybe, or even just her name. Whatever it was it just jumbled together and was unrecognizable from human speech, sounding more like the soft breathy screech of a banshee.
I let out another tear as I buried my head in her chest.
“There you go… That feels better doesn’t it, let's get you warmed up now…” She said as she rubbed my back.
After a while she loosened her grip, starting to back away.
As if acting on pure instinct I clung to her tiger, not letting even an inch of space open up between us. I felt like if I let her go for even a moment I would freeze over again and be left outside all night.
“Siya…”
Hearing my name I only clung tighter, feeling like she was going to try and leave again.
“You’re being difficult…” She said sternly.
‘Is she going to leave after all? Or… maybe test me… See if I can warm myself up from here…’ I slowly relaxed my grip lowering my head. Finally, with my shaking hands I began to let go.
She smiled softly, repetitively moving my hair back. “Good girl, now get on my back. I’ll carry you to the bathhouse.”
Taking a step back, she carefully kneeled down, shifting her weight completely onto one leg. “You should know the drill by now right?” She let out a soft chuckle, but her face kept twisting, showing several emotions at once.
I still couldn’t speak, so in the end all I could do was nod.
She turned around, and hoisted me up on her back, only shifting her weight to both legs after she had steadied me and made sure I wouldn’t fall.
As we walked I closed my eyes again, feeling her warmth even through her clothes. The fire in the back of my mind lit itself, and even though everything around it was frozen, it felt like it didn’t matter, like in time it would all melt and I would be warm again.
As my father and I stepped into the courtyard the gate closed behind us and I could faintly see Mara standing in the doorway to the dining room, looking as though she had seen a ghost.
“Siya?” she paused, almost in horror at the sight of me. I hardly responded, just offered her a glance as she ran over and grabbed my hands. “Keigan… She's colder than death… What happened?”
“It is a part of her training, her body is no longer harmed by it. She will live. More importantly, it worked. She should be much stronger now.”
She looked at me and rubbed her finger across my brow. When she pulled it away I could see it painted red. ‘Blood…’ I thought, and I began to feel nauseous.
I looked up at my father who was still wearing his stern expression. The hard training was one thing, but how he acted was another. When he had struck me I felt the heavy blow, but my body was numb, and my mind nearly empty. I had no idea just how hard he had hit me, but seeing Mara’s face, and the blood on her hand, told me more enough.
After all, if even she was in shock at the sight of me… it had to be bad. As my body began to melt I finally let a tear slip out, but it turned to ice as it rolled down my cheek, freezing before it could fall.
My brain was starting to function again, and as I finally started processing what all had happened I nearly broke down.
‘I really thought I was going to die.’ I tried to lift my arm to feel the wound on my head, but my joints were too stiff, every movement came with the cracking of ice, and my hand stopped long before it reached its destination. ‘This side of him… Can he really say that this was the only way… That it has to be done like this?’
Another tear formed in my eye, freezing before it could fall, making it hard to see. It stung… A part of me wanted nothing more than to cry my eyes out, but even at that moment, I held them back. Although, in that case, I wasn’t even sure how much I could cry. My body was emitting an aura of permafrost, too cold for any water to form.
Mara reached out to place a hand on my shoulder, but my father grabbed her hand. “It’s dangerous to touch her right now, she’s still suffering from some of the aftereffects.
I looked up at Mara, afraid I could not hide the longing in my face. When My gate was broken her warmth was the only comfort I found, even when I didn’t want it. Now that I did it seemed like I wouldn’t get it. It was like we were cursed to always be on the wrong page.
I felt so cold that my whole body was permanently stuck on edge, pins and needles running through me. I tried to shiver but was so tense that my muscles just locked up instead, eventually all cramping.
‘It's… Too dangerous to touch me?’ I lowered my eyes, looking past her to the door. ‘There's a fire inside. There has to be one right?’ I imagined the warm heat coming from the hearth. The simple thought alone was enough for me to feel warmer. ‘I’ve been alone my whole life, I can take care of myself by now. I just need to get inside.’
I tried to move my feet but the moment I stopped they froze to the ground. ‘What… now?’
My father had just said it was dangerous to touch me, and now I couldn’t move. ‘I’m stuck...’ I started crying, not just one tear, but many, each one freezing to my face until my tear ducts were blocked and I couldn’t see at all. My eyes stung, and blood swirled around them, mixing with the tears before freezing solid.
The fire in my mind froze over, just like the candle I had put out during training. ‘How long will I be stuck here… All night? I won’t even be able to warm up by the fire and it's right there…’
Everything only began to feel colder, even though the air around me was warmer than my own body. I could see a chilling fog coming off of my skin as the air around me cooled and fell to the ground.
My father took a step back. “As I said, she’s unstable right now, even being this close is risky.” He smiled nervously. “I wasn’t expecting her to have this much magic without training, it's actually kind of amazing…”
Seeing him smile at me when I was in that state sent me over the edge. I had always held back my tears, but the one time I wanted to let them out I physically couldn’t. At first, I wanted to scream, then I wanted to cry again. Denied either of those things, my mind went empty, and suddenly everything began to feel distant like I was drifting away from reality altogether.
I slowly closed my eyes, accepting my fate.
Before I drifted away the sound of cracking ice sent shivers through my whole body. ‘Shivers…’ I was moving again if you could call it that. I felt cold water dripping down my skin as I started to shudder, a tight compression wrapping around me like I had sunk into a warm cocoon.
‘Did my magic calm down… Or run out maybe? No… I can still feel it all around me… So then…’ I slowly rubbed my eyes, finally able to somewhat control my body again. They still stung, but I had to see what was happening, I had to know…
Forcing my eyes to focus I looked around, sure enough Mara had ignored the warning and wrapped her arms around me.
I grabbed her shirt, tugging on it as my body melted, and finally began to regain some sense of feeling.
I wanted to say something, but I wasn’t exactly quite sure what. a Thank you maybe, or even just her name. Whatever it was it just jumbled together and was unrecognizable from human speech, sounding more like the soft breathy screech of a banshee.
I let out another tear as I buried my head in her chest.
“There you go… That feels better doesn’t it, let's get you warmed up now…” She said as she rubbed my back.
After a while she loosened her grip, starting to back away.
As if acting on pure instinct I clung to her tiger, not letting even an inch of space open up between us. I felt like if I let her go for even a moment I would freeze over again and be left outside all night.
“Siya…”
Hearing my name I only clung tighter, feeling like she was going to try and leave again.
“You’re being difficult…” She said sternly.
‘Is she going to leave after all? Or… maybe test me… See if I can warm myself up from here…’ I slowly relaxed my grip lowering my head. Finally, with my shaking hands I began to let go.
She smiled softly, repetitively moving my hair back. “Good girl, now get on my back. I’ll carry you to the bathhouse.”
Taking a step back, she carefully kneeled down, shifting her weight completely onto one leg. “You should know the drill by now right?” She let out a soft chuckle, but her face kept twisting, showing several emotions at once.
I still couldn’t speak, so in the end all I could do was nod.
She turned around, and hoisted me up on her back, only shifting her weight to both legs after she had steadied me and made sure I wouldn’t fall.
As we walked I closed my eyes again, feeling her warmth even through her clothes. The fire in the back of my mind lit itself, and even though everything around it was frozen, it felt like it didn’t matter, like in time it would all melt and I would be warm again.
