Melissa dug her feet down into the wet sand and widened her stance. She brought her hands up close to her face to guard her center.
“Now, take a deep breath,” Hanon said.
He raised his hands as he breathed in and then shifted his palms to face down as he breathed out. Mel thought he looked ridiculous trying to show her how to breathe. She knew how to do that. The only thing she didn’t know was how to make the magic spill out from her body. So far, she’d been able to create all the different elements inside of her center. The only problem was that the magic seemed all too happy to stay there.
She needed to learn how to breathe fire and ice like Hanon could. How to soar through the sky and make her skin ten times as rough. But even Hanon didn’t know how to do those last two. He was not a full dragon yet, only a fledgling one like herself. Stuck here in the wet sand without wings to carry them to Aldrion faster.
“Visualize the fire leaving your center and traveling up your throat, then out from your mouth,” Hanon said. “Once you’ve gotten that far, you can try to make that shrub burn over there.”
Hanon pointed to a sad looking brown plant. It looked wet and in desperate need of sunlight. Mel focused on it and on the feeling of the hot liquid sensation pooling just below her heart. She visualized the fire magic moving up, but as the liquid rose in her chest, she felt panic hit her. What if it burned? What if she hurt herself?
Mel stopped, extinguishing the magic inside of her, and stood up straighter, looking at Hanon. She glanced around them, not seeing Luthel anywhere, and swallowed hard. “What if I hurt myself or …someone else?”
“You won’t,” Hanon said. “And there is no one else out here.”
“Why won’t it hurt me? It is fire, after all, right?”
Hanon shook his head. “I’m not sure. All I know is that the magic doesn’t hurt me when it’s pouring out of my body. But after, if you touch the fire when it has hit the ground, it will burn you. I don’t know why that is. Honestly, I don’t know much about my own powers. All I know comes from experimenting with different techniques myself. It wasn’t like I had anyone around to teach me.”
Mel nodded, widening her stance again, and shifted her gaze from Hanon to the small shrub before her. She took in another deep breath and let her center fill up with the familiar warm liquid. Then she coaxed the sensation to move up her chest and into her throat, feeling it burn like acid at the back of her mouth.
It was strong and Mel wanted to swallow it with some water, but fought against the urge to push the liquid down. Instead, she opened her mouth and visualized breathing fire onto the shrub, making it burn.
The sensation was so strong she took a step forward as flames rose from her mouth. She saw an alarming amount of fire passing between her lips and tried not to panic again. She breathed in through her nose and filled her belly with air, then she pushed the air out from her mouth and the flames shot forward like a cone toward the shrub.
The sad-looking plant sparked a little and the edges of the leaves were smoldering, but the twigs looked all too wet to even be bothered by the heat. Melissa took a step back, feeling lightheaded, and closed her mouth. She slumped down toward the ground and her knee sunk into the sand.
Hanon came up before her and put a hand on her shoulder, keeping her in place. She felt like debris in the wind and if he left her now, she was sure she would fly away. It was a strange feeling, one of being utterly drained of energy but happy she’d at least made the shrub spark a little.
“How are you feeling?” Hanon asked.
Mel’s eyes drifted up to him and saw concern etched into his features. “I’m fine. I did it. I made my own fire.”
A smile played on her lips and Hanon smiled back then. “You did good. I can’t believe how good, actually. You were so reluctant to use your powers before in Krazaa, but now you didn’t hesitate about using them. Sure, you’re still a bit scared perhaps, but not like before. Something has changed.”
Mel's smile dampened a little, and she grabbed Hanon’s hand to help herself up from the ground. She straightened her back, feeling like she needed to lie down a bit after this. “It’s because of the dragons,” she said. Then glanced around again, looking for Luthel. But he wasn’t anywhere to be found, so she continued, “Now that I know our powers don’t come from the void. That I’m not destined to return anything. I feel more in control and it just makes more sense to me. I’ve always been a dragon. I just didn’t know it.”
Her eyes connected with Hanon’s and she searched his face for a reaction. But his expression was neutral, giving her very little to go on. She’d been wanting to speak to him about this since Krazaa, since she’d overheard him and Luthel talking about their plans for her.
“How do you feel about it?” Mel asked.
“I don’t know what I feel about any of it,” Hanon said. “I know we’re dragons. I do know that, even if my father doesn’t. I’m not sure why he’s ignoring the truth. I just think it’s too much for him.”
Hanon dragged a hand through his hair and took a step back from Mel. His eyes shifted to the ground. “I sort of understand why he doesn’t want to know. Why he can’t accept the truth. I can feel it too. The pressure from our people and I don’t want to leave them either. The village is my family, just as much as Luthel is my father. I’ve known them for my entire life. I used to play in Lenera’s tent as a kid all the time after my mother passed. I…I just don’t know what to think about all of this. The dragons weren’t good, I know that, and I just don’t think I can be a monster.”
“But how do you really know the dragons were bad? Didn’t you say no one has seen a dragon for ages? And what about the one who attacked Aldrion? I know people say it wasn’t a dragon, but I guess if the dragon stones cracked when it died… I’m not so sure anymore what to think. How can you be so sure of anything?”
Hanon shook his head. “I just know. It’s in the stories. How they hid inside Krazaa and let the rest of the cities die. All those people, the people of the wastes. They didn’t care about saving them. Even the journal we found in the tower confirmed that and what they did to the people who were tainted… It makes my stomach churn just to think about it.”
Mel understood what Hanon was saying, but she still couldn’t reconcile with the fact that the world was made up of evil and good. She’d seen so many things contradicting that during these past few months in Aldrion and beyond the wall. She knew people weren’t black and white. They were gray like Hanon and, she supposed, Luthel, too.
“Are you really following the void’s plan, then?” she asked. “Are you taking me to Aldrion so the void can force me to infiltrate the valley? Will you return and give up your own body and let it change you into a shadow?”
Hanon took another step back from her. His eyes widened and his mouth fell open. “No, no. I’m not going to let that happen to you. I’m sorry about what you overheard. But I thought you knew I would never do that. I’m truly sorry that you have come in the middle of this. But what is happening with my father now is between him and me. It has nothing to do with you and after we leave you safely in the valley, you won’t hear from us again. I promise.”
“So you will then?”
“Will what?” Hanon said.
“Return to the void? Become a shadow?”
Hanon’s throat bobbed, and Mel felt anger rising in her veins. He couldn’t just give up. He was a dragon too, and maybe the only other dragon Mel would ever meet. She didn’t hold all the answers, but she knew they could find them together and figure out what had happened to their ancestors. What had truly happened to the world. She just needed him to trust her and not give up.
“It’s different for me,” Hanon said. “I can choose to do right by my people and surrender to the void. I can honor the sacrifices that my father has made for me and the extra time that I was given with you to help you figure out who you are. It’s enough for me. I don’t need anything more. I just want everyone to be happy.”
Mel’s eyes narrowed, and she clenched her fists to her sides. “But what if it isn’t about you, then? What if it’s about us? We figured out together who we are. Not just me. Are you just going to leave me alone as the only living dragon? I won’t figure out what we’re supposed to do to fight the void without you. Especially not if you join its side. I need your help, Hanon.”
He shook his head and averted his gaze from her, trying to avoid this conversation all together. “I’ll help you get into the valley. But I can’t do anything else for you. I’m sorry, Melissa. I have a duty to my father and the elders of the village. I can’t let them down.”
“You’re choosing to be a coward,” Mel said.
Hanon turned his back to her and stalked away toward their campsite, leaving Mel alone with the sad shrub. She wanted to run after him, to tackle him to the ground and force him to agree to not give up. To help her even after they got to the valley. But back at the campsite, she could see a figure strolling around carrying kindling to the fireplace.
Luthel was her least favorite person for the moment, but she needed his help too and she knew Hanon wasn’t going to follow her to Aldrion if she didn’t make nice with Luthel. He’d warned her about talking about the dragons and she needed to follow his orders, at least for now.
Hanon was truly a coward. He knew she couldn’t keep speaking to him about this topic with Luthel nearby and it made her furious that he was acting this way. She didn’t want to save the world. She didn’t want to think about the big picture either. But someone had to and whether she liked it or not, she’d always been chosen for this. Even in Windbrook, she’d had a great destiny to bring back the dragons, and now it was her responsibility to make sure she’d at least bring back one dragon to the valley.
Melissa dug her feet down into the wet sand and widened her stance. She brought her hands up close to her face to guard her center.
“Now, take a deep breath,” Hanon said.
He raised his hands as he breathed in and then shifted his palms to face down as he breathed out. Mel thought he looked ridiculous trying to show her how to breathe. She knew how to do that. The only thing she didn’t know was how to make the magic spill out from her body. So far, she’d been able to create all the different elements inside of her center. The only problem was that the magic seemed all too happy to stay there.
She needed to learn how to breathe fire and ice like Hanon could. How to soar through the sky and make her skin ten times as rough. But even Hanon didn’t know how to do those last two. He was not a full dragon yet, only a fledgling one like herself. Stuck here in the wet sand without wings to carry them to Aldrion faster.
“Visualize the fire leaving your center and traveling up your throat, then out from your mouth,” Hanon said. “Once you’ve gotten that far, you can try to make that shrub burn over there.”
Hanon pointed to a sad looking brown plant. It looked wet and in desperate need of sunlight. Mel focused on it and on the feeling of the hot liquid sensation pooling just below her heart. She visualized the fire magic moving up, but as the liquid rose in her chest, she felt panic hit her. What if it burned? What if she hurt herself?
Mel stopped, extinguishing the magic inside of her, and stood up straighter, looking at Hanon. She glanced around them, not seeing Luthel anywhere, and swallowed hard. “What if I hurt myself or …someone else?”
“You won’t,” Hanon said. “And there is no one else out here.”
“Why won’t it hurt me? It is fire, after all, right?”
Hanon shook his head. “I’m not sure. All I know is that the magic doesn’t hurt me when it’s pouring out of my body. But after, if you touch the fire when it has hit the ground, it will burn you. I don’t know why that is. Honestly, I don’t know much about my own powers. All I know comes from experimenting with different techniques myself. It wasn’t like I had anyone around to teach me.”
Mel nodded, widening her stance again, and shifted her gaze from Hanon to the small shrub before her. She took in another deep breath and let her center fill up with the familiar warm liquid. Then she coaxed the sensation to move up her chest and into her throat, feeling it burn like acid at the back of her mouth.
It was strong and Mel wanted to swallow it with some water, but fought against the urge to push the liquid down. Instead, she opened her mouth and visualized breathing fire onto the shrub, making it burn.
The sensation was so strong she took a step forward as flames rose from her mouth. She saw an alarming amount of fire passing between her lips and tried not to panic again. She breathed in through her nose and filled her belly with air, then she pushed the air out from her mouth and the flames shot forward like a cone toward the shrub.
The sad-looking plant sparked a little and the edges of the leaves were smoldering, but the twigs looked all too wet to even be bothered by the heat. Melissa took a step back, feeling lightheaded, and closed her mouth. She slumped down toward the ground and her knee sunk into the sand.
Hanon came up before her and put a hand on her shoulder, keeping her in place. She felt like debris in the wind and if he left her now, she was sure she would fly away. It was a strange feeling, one of being utterly drained of energy but happy she’d at least made the shrub spark a little.
“How are you feeling?” Hanon asked.
Mel’s eyes drifted up to him and saw concern etched into his features. “I’m fine. I did it. I made my own fire.”
A smile played on her lips and Hanon smiled back then. “You did good. I can’t believe how good, actually. You were so reluctant to use your powers before in Krazaa, but now you didn’t hesitate about using them. Sure, you’re still a bit scared perhaps, but not like before. Something has changed.”
Mel's smile dampened a little, and she grabbed Hanon’s hand to help herself up from the ground. She straightened her back, feeling like she needed to lie down a bit after this. “It’s because of the dragons,” she said. Then glanced around again, looking for Luthel. But he wasn’t anywhere to be found, so she continued, “Now that I know our powers don’t come from the void. That I’m not destined to return anything. I feel more in control and it just makes more sense to me. I’ve always been a dragon. I just didn’t know it.”
Her eyes connected with Hanon’s and she searched his face for a reaction. But his expression was neutral, giving her very little to go on. She’d been wanting to speak to him about this since Krazaa, since she’d overheard him and Luthel talking about their plans for her.
“How do you feel about it?” Mel asked.
“I don’t know what I feel about any of it,” Hanon said. “I know we’re dragons. I do know that, even if my father doesn’t. I’m not sure why he’s ignoring the truth. I just think it’s too much for him.”
Hanon dragged a hand through his hair and took a step back from Mel. His eyes shifted to the ground. “I sort of understand why he doesn’t want to know. Why he can’t accept the truth. I can feel it too. The pressure from our people and I don’t want to leave them either. The village is my family, just as much as Luthel is my father. I’ve known them for my entire life. I used to play in Lenera’s tent as a kid all the time after my mother passed. I…I just don’t know what to think about all of this. The dragons weren’t good, I know that, and I just don’t think I can be a monster.”
“But how do you really know the dragons were bad? Didn’t you say no one has seen a dragon for ages? And what about the one who attacked Aldrion? I know people say it wasn’t a dragon, but I guess if the dragon stones cracked when it died… I’m not so sure anymore what to think. How can you be so sure of anything?”
Hanon shook his head. “I just know. It’s in the stories. How they hid inside Krazaa and let the rest of the cities die. All those people, the people of the wastes. They didn’t care about saving them. Even the journal we found in the tower confirmed that and what they did to the people who were tainted… It makes my stomach churn just to think about it.”
Mel understood what Hanon was saying, but she still couldn’t reconcile with the fact that the world was made up of evil and good. She’d seen so many things contradicting that during these past few months in Aldrion and beyond the wall. She knew people weren’t black and white. They were gray like Hanon and, she supposed, Luthel, too.
“Are you really following the void’s plan, then?” she asked. “Are you taking me to Aldrion so the void can force me to infiltrate the valley? Will you return and give up your own body and let it change you into a shadow?”
Hanon took another step back from her. His eyes widened and his mouth fell open. “No, no. I’m not going to let that happen to you. I’m sorry about what you overheard. But I thought you knew I would never do that. I’m truly sorry that you have come in the middle of this. But what is happening with my father now is between him and me. It has nothing to do with you and after we leave you safely in the valley, you won’t hear from us again. I promise.”
“So you will then?”
“Will what?” Hanon said.
“Return to the void? Become a shadow?”
Hanon’s throat bobbed, and Mel felt anger rising in her veins. He couldn’t just give up. He was a dragon too, and maybe the only other dragon Mel would ever meet. She didn’t hold all the answers, but she knew they could find them together and figure out what had happened to their ancestors. What had truly happened to the world. She just needed him to trust her and not give up.
“It’s different for me,” Hanon said. “I can choose to do right by my people and surrender to the void. I can honor the sacrifices that my father has made for me and the extra time that I was given with you to help you figure out who you are. It’s enough for me. I don’t need anything more. I just want everyone to be happy.”
Mel’s eyes narrowed, and she clenched her fists to her sides. “But what if it isn’t about you, then? What if it’s about us? We figured out together who we are. Not just me. Are you just going to leave me alone as the only living dragon? I won’t figure out what we’re supposed to do to fight the void without you. Especially not if you join its side. I need your help, Hanon.”
He shook his head and averted his gaze from her, trying to avoid this conversation all together. “I’ll help you get into the valley. But I can’t do anything else for you. I’m sorry, Melissa. I have a duty to my father and the elders of the village. I can’t let them down.”
“You’re choosing to be a coward,” Mel said.
Hanon turned his back to her and stalked away toward their campsite, leaving Mel alone with the sad shrub. She wanted to run after him, to tackle him to the ground and force him to agree to not give up. To help her even after they got to the valley. But back at the campsite, she could see a figure strolling around carrying kindling to the fireplace.
Luthel was her least favorite person for the moment, but she needed his help too and she knew Hanon wasn’t going to follow her to Aldrion if she didn’t make nice with Luthel. He’d warned her about talking about the dragons and she needed to follow his orders, at least for now.
Hanon was truly a coward. He knew she couldn’t keep speaking to him about this topic with Luthel nearby and it made her furious that he was acting this way. She didn’t want to save the world. She didn’t want to think about the big picture either. But someone had to and whether she liked it or not, she’d always been chosen for this. Even in Windbrook, she’d had a great destiny to bring back the dragons, and now it was her responsibility to make sure she’d at least bring back one dragon to the valley.
